I think you have tapped into some truths about language and how it can serve as yet more walls in a trap. This makes me reflect on my own words, and for that I'm thankful
So glad this topic resonates with you Mike! Words have so much power. Many times we feel uncomfortable when we hear them but we don t quite realise how much they affect us! Words = energy and it interferes with our life force. Planning to write from this perspective as well. Thank you for your comment.
When I was suffering the most I needed an ear and luckily I had a group of people who were willing to listen. It was hard for me to share as I identify as a strong, independent woman. My mind was filled with "how did this happen to me" and "why did this happen to me" after I ended an untenable marriage. The pain I emanated was palpable.
I know it wasn't easy for them to bear witness to my pain but I am forever grateful. When someone is in pain listen with open ears and an open heart. You don't need to have been there to support them. Holld space for them.
Be kind; for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle ~ John Watson.
Dear April, I hear you! It must have been unbelievably hard—so much to process, so many memories—good, bad, ugly. Sometimes, strong codependency ties are in the mix, along with so much more. A non-judgmental, compassionate ear is priceless. A shoulder to cry on, freely given, is invaluable.
I resonate 100% with the concept of a strong, independent woman and everything that comes with it—including the self-punishment and self-loathing. How could I allow this? Where was my head? How could I be so gullible, so blind? I know that struggle all too well, and so do you.
Holding space for someone in need—what a powerful act. Beautiful words, April. Absolutely! Big hug brave soul!
Yes, Adina. They do, and the reasons are multiple. It’s a form of self-projection, which, in my view, stems from a lack of proper listening. Thanks so much for your comment!
For me your words also have a broader message, adopting a mindset in everything one does to be non judgmental if you are not truly knowledgeable in the subject. This particular mindset is so important in relation to cross community/ border/ culture exchanges when listening and understanding why first is good advice. P
Glad you resonated with my words. One can indeed extrapolate this concept and cover life situations in all their complexity. As always thank you for your comment!
Karina, sociable and sensitive description of a situation many people are suffering in. It is easier for those, who are de facto victims but shrug off the mantle of victimhood. They also suffer, but lucky to straighten their backbone. When my whole life was stolen from me by closing down our successful foundation and two affiliated companies, I was a victim. Period, but tried to chase away victimhood, with moderate results.
Dear Soul Father, I hear you! I am completely with you and am planning a session on being a victim of circumstance and being pushed into unimaginable situations. The self-help movement has, unfortunately, attached shame to many terms that never deserved it. Your words—“having life stolen away from them” - resonate deeply with me because I can relate. Some experiences need to be named for what they are; certain realities cannot be sugarcoated. Acknowledging the truth is crucial in gaining a sort of validation and from that place try and regain a sense of hope and purpose. I treasure your words!
It's important to reconsider this term, and others like it, in the way that you have. Perhaps 'identification' becomes the key issue in the use of 'labels'. Naming a thing suggests we have influence over that thing, if we identify with the label then it has influence over us. In essence we have human experiences that by all definitions can be painfully difficult to deal with. This is being honest and necessary in understanding what can be done for our well-being.
So true Martin! That’s such an insightful way to look at it. The power of naming is huge it can either give us agency or trap us in an identity that limits our growth. Recognising painful experiences for what they are is crucial, but identifying “with” them can keep us stuck. I think the challenge is to acknowledge the impact of what happened without letting it define who we are. Most of the time is not easy. It’s a delicate balance—honesty without attachment. Planning another session on being a victim of circumstances with historical examples as well. Thanks so much for your comment!
Karina,
I think you have tapped into some truths about language and how it can serve as yet more walls in a trap. This makes me reflect on my own words, and for that I'm thankful
So glad this topic resonates with you Mike! Words have so much power. Many times we feel uncomfortable when we hear them but we don t quite realise how much they affect us! Words = energy and it interferes with our life force. Planning to write from this perspective as well. Thank you for your comment.
When I was suffering the most I needed an ear and luckily I had a group of people who were willing to listen. It was hard for me to share as I identify as a strong, independent woman. My mind was filled with "how did this happen to me" and "why did this happen to me" after I ended an untenable marriage. The pain I emanated was palpable.
I know it wasn't easy for them to bear witness to my pain but I am forever grateful. When someone is in pain listen with open ears and an open heart. You don't need to have been there to support them. Holld space for them.
Be kind; for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle ~ John Watson.
Dear April, I hear you! It must have been unbelievably hard—so much to process, so many memories—good, bad, ugly. Sometimes, strong codependency ties are in the mix, along with so much more. A non-judgmental, compassionate ear is priceless. A shoulder to cry on, freely given, is invaluable.
I resonate 100% with the concept of a strong, independent woman and everything that comes with it—including the self-punishment and self-loathing. How could I allow this? Where was my head? How could I be so gullible, so blind? I know that struggle all too well, and so do you.
Holding space for someone in need—what a powerful act. Beautiful words, April. Absolutely! Big hug brave soul!
I think you’re right in that often people respond to their own uncomfortable feelings rather than the person needing support 🤍
Yes, Adina. They do, and the reasons are multiple. It’s a form of self-projection, which, in my view, stems from a lack of proper listening. Thanks so much for your comment!
For me your words also have a broader message, adopting a mindset in everything one does to be non judgmental if you are not truly knowledgeable in the subject. This particular mindset is so important in relation to cross community/ border/ culture exchanges when listening and understanding why first is good advice. P
Glad you resonated with my words. One can indeed extrapolate this concept and cover life situations in all their complexity. As always thank you for your comment!
Karina, sociable and sensitive description of a situation many people are suffering in. It is easier for those, who are de facto victims but shrug off the mantle of victimhood. They also suffer, but lucky to straighten their backbone. When my whole life was stolen from me by closing down our successful foundation and two affiliated companies, I was a victim. Period, but tried to chase away victimhood, with moderate results.
Dear Soul Father, I hear you! I am completely with you and am planning a session on being a victim of circumstance and being pushed into unimaginable situations. The self-help movement has, unfortunately, attached shame to many terms that never deserved it. Your words—“having life stolen away from them” - resonate deeply with me because I can relate. Some experiences need to be named for what they are; certain realities cannot be sugarcoated. Acknowledging the truth is crucial in gaining a sort of validation and from that place try and regain a sense of hope and purpose. I treasure your words!
As always, we not only understand but feel each other. It is natural between daughter and father.🫶
This is unbelievably true! One of those special experiences one comes across and is very very grateful! A big virtual hug from me!
One day, it can be even physical!
It's important to reconsider this term, and others like it, in the way that you have. Perhaps 'identification' becomes the key issue in the use of 'labels'. Naming a thing suggests we have influence over that thing, if we identify with the label then it has influence over us. In essence we have human experiences that by all definitions can be painfully difficult to deal with. This is being honest and necessary in understanding what can be done for our well-being.
So true Martin! That’s such an insightful way to look at it. The power of naming is huge it can either give us agency or trap us in an identity that limits our growth. Recognising painful experiences for what they are is crucial, but identifying “with” them can keep us stuck. I think the challenge is to acknowledge the impact of what happened without letting it define who we are. Most of the time is not easy. It’s a delicate balance—honesty without attachment. Planning another session on being a victim of circumstances with historical examples as well. Thanks so much for your comment!